I want to talk about this idea of success and the false illusions that being successful in someone else’s eyes will bring you happiness. As I live and experience more, I think that theory is pure horse shit.
Lets be honest, as we get older, it seems to get harder and harder to stay true to ourselves. We start giving up our independence to join the cattle line right when our peers and elders start ridiculing us. Why is that? Have we become so callus from what life has already thrown our way? Are we scared of failing? Do we have such low self esteems that we just want to be accepted? Or has society brainwashed us that there are strict guidelines to what a “successful” normal life is? To me, normal is merely average. Its like in school when we studied graphs, we always seem to study the average percentile of things.. and not the lone percent. Why is that? If were looking at the true potential in people.. Why do we look at the average? Its like giving everyone the same name, having them wear the same clothes, listen to the same music and then tell them “Alright, Now be individual!” We should be looking at the lone dots in these graphs that are far aways from the average. The free spirits.
When I first started my career in music, I always tried to chase the rabbits tale.. If the bands wrote songs about being heart broken then I felt i had to write songs about being heart broken.. If they wore flannels, grew beards or played a banjo then I thought I had to do that too.. I thought I had to act and dress like everybody else to make it in life because thats what people told me to do.. I shot myself in the foot for years just because I was doing what everyone else thought was success and not what I thought was success.
I think, we need to reverse the formula of happiness to success.. We need to stop thinking that if we work harder, then we will be more successful.. and if were more successful THEN will be happy. This is completely backwards. Because with this thinking, every time your brain has a success, you now have just changed your idea of what success means. If you got good grades last year now you have to get better grades this year, If you made solid money this quarter now you have to make better money next quarter.. We are so focused on doing things better and better and stress about “making” it or impressing others that we never really had time to sit back and enjoy the accomplishments we just achieved.
Phycologist, Shawn Anchor, has once said, “If happiness is always at the opposite of success then you’ll never get there..” I can’t agree with him more. A majority of our longterm happiness is predicted not by the external world but by how our brains process the world. if we can change the lenses we use to view life not only can we change our reality but also our happiness, our relationships with people, and even our day to day motions. We need to try and always stay postive.. Our brain works better when we are positive. We accept knowledge easier and we appreciate the littler things in life. We also need to find a way to always stay in the present. We seem happiest when we are in the moment and not thinking about what has happen or whats going to happen. I can see it at my shows everyday.. Im happiest when I’m in the moment with my fans sharing an experience and not when I’m in my head wondering how I’m going to pay the gas bill tomorrow.
So what I’m trying to get at is, lets not to be so quick to judge your dreams with other peoples. Everybody is different (even if they tell you other wise) Don’t let envy get in the way of our true goals and aspirations. And lastly, Never give up on YOUR ideas of what you would consider success. They might be different then your peers and elders but fuck it, ITS YOUR LIFE not theirs. Focus in on the ideas you call your own and be the creator of your own ambitions because its bad enough not getting what you want.. but it’s even worse to have an idea of what you want and find out when you lying on your deathbed that it isn’t in fact what you wanted all along.
So stay positive, be successful in your own eyes and lets accept the strangeness of some of our ideas and own the dreams you want to see in your life. And if we can do that.. maybe we can find what we’ve been looking for this whole time.. inner happiness.
Stay Inspired and always try to dance to the beat of your own drum,
– Share this with anybody who might need a pick me up